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Homes and Communities Agency: South Bristol’s regeneration takes major step forward

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Gulf of Mexico Takes Center Stage at the State of the Gulf of Mexico SUMMIT2011, Hosted by Harte Research Institute for Gulf of Mexico Studies

Gulf of Mexico Takes Center Stage at the State of the Gulf of Mexico SUMMIT2011, Hosted by Harte Research Institute for Gulf of Mexico Studies

Corpus Christi, TX (PRWEB) November 04, 2011

During December 4 – 8, 2011, at the Omni Galleria in Houston, Texas, hundreds of experts and leaders from academic institutions, government, non-governmental organizations, and the private sector will come together at the 2nd State of the Gulf of Mexico Summit (SGM SUMMIT2011).

Unprecedented cooperation has established the groundwork for this diverse conference. Leaders have contributed their time and resources in preparation for this high-level event. “Bringing these experts together to focus attention on the Gulf of Mexico creates a level of synergy that is critical to developing solutions. We all understand the importance of an economically and environmentally sustainable Gulf of Mexico,” said Dr. Larry McKinney, Harte Research Institute’s Executive Director. “At SGM SUMMIT2011, our goal is to devise a plan to make sure we get there.”

A unique feature of the SGM SUMMIT2011 is an emphasis on developing an effective “report card” that can be used by resource managers and decision makers in science and business to understand the impacts of our activity. “A credible report card focuses public attention and generates support for actions essential to assuring a healthy and productive Gulf,” said McKinney. “This Report Card directly benefits industry’s need for objective ocean data and helps establish the baseline for ongoing review and trend assessment.”

A yearlong series of stepping stone meetings and workshops has preceded the SGM SUMMIT2011 — some in direct support of the Summit and some contributing to it. The Nature Conservancy led a coalition of conservation groups which included the Ocean Conservancy and National Wildlife Federation, among others, to develop a common restoration strategy for the Gulf. The International Union for Conservation of Nature (IUCN) led a similar international effort in Mexico.

A newly formed organization, The Gulf of Mexico University Research Collaborative (GOMURC), comprised of 66 members from the leading marine research organizations in the Gulf of Mexico, will roll out a plan at the summit to assure that management and restoration goals are built on the best available science foundation. And, the Gulf Alliance, whose initial work started at the first summit, will bring together state and federal resource managers and leaders at the summit to enhance its role the one of the leading regional governance frameworks in the nation.

Through the work of the Harte Research Institute and the Gulf of Mexico Foundation, leading business and industries from oil and gas to tourism and agriculture have joined in supporting the SGM SUMMIT2011. As the 2010 oil spill dramatically emphasized, we must interact with the Gulf of Mexico as partners. Assuring a healthy Gulf is important for enjoyable recreation, profitable commerce, and a sustainable environment.

“The world’s oceans, and the Gulf of Mexico in particular, need all of our best efforts to assure their future,” stated Dr. Sylvia Earle, renown oceanographer and Chair of the HRI Advisory committee. “This valuable resource faces many challenges and the SGM SUMMIT2011 brings focus on how we can meet them.”

Facilitating these relationships is at the center of The Harte Research Institute for Gulf of Mexico Studies’ mission. Located at Texas A&M University-Corpus Christi, this unique institute was endowed by Ed Harte, with a challenge to make a difference in the Gulf of Mexico. SGM SUMMIT2011 offers an unprecedented opportunity to interact with those who know the Gulf of Mexico best.

The four day SGM SUMMIT2011 agenda will cover a broad range of important issues focusing on vision, science, commerce, and cooperation. During the summit, leaders of the “President’s Gulf Coast Ecosystem Restoration Task Force” will head a panel to discuss the status and implementation strategies in the Restoration Plan; the conservation and expansion of marine protected areas will be explored; and, CEOs from organizations representing key stakeholders in the Gulf will participate in an evening panel to share their thoughts.

Sponsors of the SGM SUMMIT2011 include: Friends of HRI, The Harte Research Institute, Texas A&M University-Corpus Christi, Shell, IUCN, The Gulf of Mexico Foundation, The Nature Conservancy, BP, GOMURC, National Wildlife Federation, NOAA, USGS, Ocean Conservancy, Texas Parks and Wildlife, Gulf of Mexico Alliance, Port of Corpus Christi, and Mote Marine Lab.

The initial SGM Summit, held in 2006, brought together world-renowned scientists with leaders of government, business and industry, conservation, and resource management to plan for the long-term sustainable quality of life in the Gulf. SGM SUMMIT2011 will build on that work to facilitate sound strategies essential to the prosperity of the United States, Mexico and Cuba.

For information on the upcoming “State of the Gulf of Mexico” Summit, visit our website http://www.sgmsummit.org.

The Harte Research Institute for Gulf of Mexico Studies, located on the Texas A&M University – Corpus Christi campus, was founded in 2000 with a $ 46 million grant from Mr. Ed Harte. Its mission is to support and advance the long-term health of the Gulf of Mexico both economically and ecologically.

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Bush Takes Harder Line on Immigration in Nod to Conservatives

George Bush flew to the Mexican border yesterday to call for a crackdown on illegal immigration in an attempt to appease his party’s right wing, which is resisting the White House plan to establish a guest worker programme for illegal immigrants already in the country.

In a fiercely-worded speech to border guards at an air force base outside Tucson, Arizona, Mr Bush outlined his proposals to “secure the border by catching those who enter illegally and hardening the border to prevent illegal crossings”.

He set out a list of measures to seal the holes in America’s porous southern border, involving more patrols, more fences, bigger detention facilities and drone aircraft along the Rio Grande frontier. Illegal Mexican immigrants, who account for 85% of those caught trying to cross the border, would not simply be dumped on the other side but would be transported back to their home towns in the Mexican interior, making it more difficult and expensive for them to try again.

Non-Mexicans, most of whom are released after capture for lack of space in US immigration cells, would either be flown back home or held in expanded jails pending deportation.

“Illegal immigration is a serious challenge and our responsibility is clear: we’re going to protect the border,” Mr Bush declared. The attempt to seal the frontier is being couched in terms of national security. It comes a month after President Bush signed a $32bn (£19bn) homeland security bill, which included big increases for border protection, including 1,000 new patrol agents. The crackdown was intended as a counterweight to a year-old Bush initiative to grant guest-worker status to the more than 10 million illegal immigrants in the country. That proposal has stalled in the face of conservative opposition.

“Bush decided to give these guys their rhetorical pound of flesh,” a Republican official close to the White House told Time magazine. “In return, he wants a comprehensive bill, which is what he has always wanted. He’s just going to lead with a lot of noise about border security.”

Under the programme proposed by President Bush, illegal immigrants already living and working in the US would be offered three-year work visas, renewable for another three years. After that the immigrants would have to return to their home country and wait a year before applying for a new work permit.

In his speech yesterday, Mr Bush repeatedly insisted that the plan did not amount to an amnesty, which is anathema to Republican rightwingers. “The programme that I propose would not create an automatic path to citizenship. It wouldn’t provide for amnesty. I oppose amnesty. Rewarding those who have broken the law would encourage others to break the law and keep pressure on our border,” the president said. “But people in this debate must recognise that we will not be able to effectively enforce our immigration laws until we create a temporary worker programme.”

With his popularity plummeting, Mr Bush’s problems deepened yesterday when a Republican congressman from California, Randy “Duke” Cunningham, resigned after pleading guilty to accepting more than $2m in bribes from defence contractors. It follows a series of other scandals involving Republican politicians that have contributed to an atmosphere of sleaze surrounding the party as it prepares to fight the congressional elections next November.

Tags: Bush, Conservatives, Harder, Immigration, Line, Takes

Evil Takes a Holiday

Chapter One: A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts

Once upon a time there were two men, living at the same time in the same country. These two men were as different as night and day, and yet they possessed one common thread: the protection of their country against terrorism.

David Meerschaum was a very tall, dark and handsome mild-mannered man, worldly and sophisticated, soft-spoken but firm in his beliefs. Shlomo Palmer was a medium-height blondish, handsome and slightly excitable man, also worldy and sophisticated, but not very soft-spoken. He also had firm beliefs and voiced them often, although always under clever disguises. It was instant friendship from the beginning, each of them recognizing in the other, the commonality between them. They could even read each other’s thoughts, and occasionally finish each other’s sentences. They decided to team up and develop their own organization, which they called “A.U.N.T.” (America Under No Terror). Their arch-enemy, an evil organization called “F.L.U.S.H.” (Foreign Liars Under Sleazy Hooligans), was soon on their heels, their one goal: to annihilate A.U.N.T. and all that it stood for.

The first case of Meerschaum and Palmer began in the little known island of Bongo-bongo, somewhere in the South Pacific. Lush vegetation, clear waters and beautiful women all added up to an adventure that both were looking forward to. Unfortunately, agents from F.L.U.S.H. had already ensconced themselves there quite comfortably several months ahead of our two heros, and had bribed the inhabitants with a never-ending supply of the best Kobe beef money could buy. They held the local population at their mercy, and enjoyed the hedonistic life-style so absent in their own countries.

When our two heros arrived, they were greeted by a bevy of beautiful island women, eager to get to know these strangers to their shores. As Meerschaum and Palmer were both in disguise, playing the roles of Hollywood movie agents, throngs of men and women followed them from their launch to their luxury beach cabana, inundating them with questions and generally being a nuisance. Only the mayor knew their true identity. Once safely in the privacy of their home for the next few weeks, they breathed a sigh of relief that the first step was over: fooling the public. With luck, the F.L.U.S.H. agents wouldn’t have a clue that these two sleuths were on their tails. Their mission: to flush F.L.U.S.H. down the toilet of evil forever.

After a peaceful night they awakened to the sound of loud drumming just outside their cabana. The custom of this island is to greet the dawn of each new day by making the loudest noise possible, in this case some timpani that were left behind by the New York Philharmonic on their last visit there. Meerschaum pulled his heavy down pillow over his head, groaning, while Palmer shot up like a rocket, suspicious of the cacaphony and what it could mean.

“Hey, Meerschaum!” Palmer barked at him.
“Oh . . . leave me alone, Palmer, I had a bad night, ” mumbled Meerschaum from underneath his pillow.
“Bad night, good night, there’s something going on out there and we’ve got to find out what it is.” Palmer got out of bed and walked over to the window, pulled up the bamboo blinds and squinted into the bright sunlinght. Immediately he saw the source of the noise, and emitted an expletive.
“Gotta stop that right now! Don’t want that happening every morning.” Palmer opened the door, and asked the band to stop playing in his most polite manner. The band didn’t seem to respond and kept on beating the drums just as loudly as before.
“HEY!!!! I asked you guys to be QUIET!” Yelled Palmer. Suddenly the band stopped, wide-eyed and shocked at the vehemence in Palmer’s voice.
“Please, Mr. Palmer, this is a custom of our little island. They don’t mean any harm. I am very sorry.” explained the hotel owner. Palmer asked him if they could just tone it down in the future, to which the hotel owner promised to comply with Palmer’s wishes.

Breakfast passed pleasantly enough, with dark red papaya and strong island-grown coffee. Meerschaum stood up, stretched and announced that he was going inside to catch up on the latest news from his laptop, while Palmer decided to take a walk around the island to listen to the locals gossiping. If they were supposed to be Hollywood agents, they had better look and act the parts, thought Palmer, and suggested to Meerschaum that they both wear sunglasses all the time; besides, it would help keep them incognito. They were attempting to look laid-back, wearing sandals, Bermuda shorts and t-shirts, trying to fit into the local scene of vacationers. It was going to be slowly, slowly, catchy monkey if they wanted to defeat the enemy. Jumping in at the deep end and ruining everything before it began was not on the agenda; all successes were based upon perfect timing and execution. They decided to meet up for lunch at 1:00 sharp at the Gazebo, the outdoor restaurant on the beach.

“Find out anything?” asked Meerschaum, while sipping his Mai Tai.
“Not yet, ” replied Palmer, while crunching his coconut-dipped deep fried shrimp. The sun was straight overhead, beating down on the roof of the restaurant, although a cooling sea breeze occasionally wafted towards the two sleuths.
“We’ve got to mingle with the people more, get to know who’s who here, that kind of stuff,” remarked Meerschaum. He had his own ideas about how to extract information from the locals and tourists alike, but wasn’t about to divulge his plans to Palmer—-at least, not yet. Although they were fast friends, there was that tiny amount of professional one-upmanship that sometimes happens when super-sleuths are thrown together on a mission. Palmer had his own ideas, too, but kept them close to his chest for the time being.

“I’ve been mingling, Meerschaum, but really, these people just don’t seem to gossip. I mean, I had three Island Hoppers at the bar, trying to listen in to these two guys wearing suits, but then they noticed me and moved away. Funny, those suits . . . in this climate? ” Palmer’s voice trailed away into his own private ponderings while Meerschaum looked at him through his drink.
“Did it ever occur to you, Palmer, that these ‘guys in suits’ could be F.L.U.S.H. agents?” queried Meerschaum.
Palmer spit out a shrimp tail, and it landed on Meerschaum’s plate. Meerschaum merely looked down at it and brushed it off.
“Meerschaum! That is the absolute most obvious trick in the book! An evil agent looking like an evil agent? C’mon, you should know better than that. No F.L.U.S.H. agent is going to look like a F.L.U.S.H. agent, are they?” Palmer had that knowing look in his eyes, confident in his assumption about what evil agents really looked like.

“O.K., Palmer, but you know they are very clever. Yes, very clever indeed, and could be using the old dress-like-an-evil-agent disguise to fool us. You know, they are evil agents but think that by dressing like evil agents, no one in their right mind would suspect that they really are evil agents. Get it?” And with that, Meerschaum finished his Mai Tai and started into his hot Singapore noodles.

Palmer hated it when Meerschaum was right, and he very well could be in this instance. Perhaps those two thug-looking men were F.L.U.S.H. agents, just floating around the island. What were they doing here and how long had they been enjoying this tropical paradise and WHERE was their headquarters here? Two great minds think alike and both men quickly rose from their bamboo chairs, signed the tab for lunch, then strode off together. It was about time to get into their roles as Hollywood agents and hold bogus auditions for the next big fake flick, “Pirates of the South Pacific” . It was in this way that they hoped to capture the F.L.U.S.H. agents, but it was going to be a long haul.

Chapter Two: Who Are Those Men in the Foster Grants?

“Could we PLEASE have some order here? I said ORDER!!! One at a time, please!” yelled Palmer as he tried to hold the crowd of Hollywood hopefuls at bay. This was going to be harder than he thought, as Palmer frantically waved to his counterpart in espionage.
“Hey, Meerschaum, I could use a little help here!” he called out in his most Hollywood-agent sounding voice.
“Oh, yeah, right, Palmer. I’ll be over in a minute.” Meerschaum quickly closed his laptop, which he never left behind. It was his lifeline, his main addiction. Women could be considered his other addiction but when he was on an assignment, it was all business and no pleasure. Which was going to be difficult when surrounded by all these island beauties. . . . He strode over in double-time to where Palmer was attempting to explain what parts were needed for this film.
“We need a lot of extras, you know, people to work on the ships, on the shores, fishermen, etc. Would the women please get into this line, and the men in this? Thank you. ” After about an hour into the auditions, small beads of sweat were beginning to appear on Palmer’s upper lip, which he quickly wiped off with the back of his wrist. The wind had died down and the sun was scorchingly hot. It was going to be a long day; this play-acting at pretending to be Hollywood agents isn’t that easy, thought Palmer to himself, and then he spied something strange going on near the quay.

There were the two men he saw earlier, still in their suits and sunglasses, measuring something next to the beach bar, the Lee Shore. Palmer was determined to get to know these gentlemen a little better, and suggested to Meerschaum that they take a well-deserved break and have a drink at the bar. Meerschaum complied with this plan, as it had been a grueling day and he could just feel that ice-cold Margarita sliding down his parched throat.
As they sipped their drinks, they tried to listen to what the two sunglasses-clad men were saying, but with the sound of the surf and a beach volleyball game going on, it was difficult. One of the men noticed Meerschaum and Palmer, stopped what he was doing and walked over to them.

“Hello, I noticed you watching us. Aren’t you the Hollywood agents for that new movie, Pirates of the South Pacific?” the heavier of the mysterious men asked.

“Yeah,” answered Palmer, “We’re the ones; he’s David Meerschaum and I’m Shlomo Palmer. Nice to meet you, Mr. . .?”
“Smith. John Smith, at your service,” offered the stranger. “Yeah, yeah, I know, but it’s my real name. No one believes it, but it’s true. My parents didn’t have much imagination . . .” His voice trailed off and he grew bleary-eyed, as if he was remembering something in his past. “Just call me Johnny. That’s what my dear mother called me.”
“O.K., Johnny,” answered both of them in unison. “Join us for a drink?”
“Oh, no, sorry I never drink while working; that’s one of my rules. ” And before they could ask if he would join them for dinner later, he had turned around and walked back to his colleague, who was still busy measuring something.

“That was the oddest exchange I have ever encountered,” said Palmer. “Did you hear his weird accent? Sort of cross between Russian and Chinese. And he doesn’t look like a John Smith either. ‘it’s my real name’ what a load of bull . . . . .” but Meerschaum hadn’t heard a thing Palmer said because just at that moment, the most beautiful woman appeared from behind the bar and stood in front of Meerschaum.

“Hi, David, it’s been a long time . . .” Meerschaum couldn’t move from his bar stool, so stunned he was at this vision of lovliness, this strawberry blond from another time in his life.

“Serena . . .” Meerschaum announced her name as if she were a ghost. . . in a way, she was an apparition.
“So, you do remember me after all these years?” asked the lovely Serena. “I heard you were coming here, but darling, Hollywood agents? Now what are you up to?”

“SH-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” hushed Meerschaum in his loudest stage whisper. “How did you know we were coming here? And aren’t you still working for the government?”
“No, darling, I quit that business a long time ago. Got so tired of all the murders, suicides, etc. so decided to cut out and come here. I live here now, it’s wonderful to be so cut off from all that nasty stuff that I used to love.” At this, she moved closer to Meerschaum and ran her finger down his cheek. This had the desired effect and Meerschuam blushed profusely.
“Ha ha ha ha, I can still do it to you, David!” laughed the evil Serena. “Now, tell me who is your handsome friend?”

“Oh, no, you aren’t getting your claws into Palmer! He’s too nice for you to ruin.” At that retort, Meerschaum stood up and blocked Serena’s view of Palmer, who had been totally absorbed in watching the two men, still measuring.
“Out of my way, you party pooper!” Serena pushed past him and made a direct beeline for Palmer.
“Hello, l’ll introduce myself since your friend is so rude. I’m Serena Samson, formerly of the F.B.I.”
“I’m Shlomo Palmer. Hollywood agent,” stumbled Palmer.
“Oh, cut it out, Mr. Palmer. I know you work for A.U.N.T. I know everything about that organization, except that I don’t know you yet,” purred Serena, while stroking Palmer’s cheek. It had the same effect on Palmer that it had on Meerschaum, the rising redness on his cheek was proof of this.
Meerschaum looked upon this little scene with a mixture of envy and fear; envy because he had once loved Serena, and fear, because he knew that she could destroy Palmer and all their plans with one wicked word from her beautiful lips. Something had to be done, and done quickly, to quell this evil vixen.

Chapter 3: You Dirty Rat

“Where’s my red tie?” demanded Palmer, as he scoured the wardrobe for his beloved silk cravat.
“I can’t believe that you are actually going out with her!” quipped Meerschaum, annoyed and even a little jealous of his friend. “You know she is up to no good, so why are you putting yourself through this torture?”
“Because” answered Palmer, as he created a beautiful knot in his tie, “I plan to bribe Little Bo-Peep with lots of pretty baubles if she tells me how we can get to the F.L.U.S.H. agents before they get to us.” His dinner jacket the finishing touch to his evening clothes, Palmer grabbed his key and swept out of their cabana into the balmy night, whistling a merry tune, while Meerschaum scowled and although he knew he couldn’t stop his friend, was certain that something bad was going to happen. Palmer was a big boy, he could take care of himself, but that woman was Pure Poison and sure to get into his system. Once that happened, he was hooked and the mission may as well be chucked altogether. One bright hope, however, was that Palmer would come to his senses before it was too late.

Serena and Palmer walked along the shore in the twilight, on their way to the hotel’s best restaurant, the Kontiki Room. Ceiling fans, white wicker chairs and impeccable service made the evening fly by. Palmer was the perfect host, plying his lady with more wine, more foie gras, more Cointreau, until he was sure she was pliable enough to talk. What he didn’t know was that Serena had slipped a sleeping tablet into Palmer’s wine and it was starting to take effect.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I feel like I need to sleep,” yawned Palmer as he signed the tab, and they left the restaurant. He knew he hadn’t had that much to drink, he’d made sure that Serena had more wine than he did, so why did he feel like so drowsy?
“Listen, Serena, I have to go back to my cabana, something’s wrong with me . . . I don’t feel very well—”

Suddenly Palmer collapsed and Serena took out her tiny penlight and flashed a signal to her cohorts, the men in suits. They appeared from under the pier, dragged Palmer onto a makeshift wagon, and pulled him out of sight. That accomplished, they paid Serena her usual charge, $1,000 cash on the spot. She greedily stuffed it down her dress and made her way surreptitiously back to her own cabana. There she put the money into her safe, where there was a lot more of the dirty green stuff. She smiled the smile of the Cheshire cat, another day’s work done. Stripping off her dress, she flung back the cool white sheets and flopped into bed, satiated and exhausted from too much wine. Tomorrow she would have to face Meerschaum, but she would invent something plausible that she hoped he would believe. After all, he was going to be her next victim. With Meerschaum and Palmer out of the picture, F.L.U.S.H. would once more flourish and the world of terror would reign supreme.

Chapter 4: Pandora’s Box

Meerschaum slept poorly, and sometime in the early hours of the morning, woke up to look at his travel clock. It read 4:17; he looked over at Palmer’s bed but there was no Palmer in it. Strange, he thought, Palmer usually isn’t a party animal. . . a sick feeling swept over him and he realized that something nasty had happened to him. He quickly pulled on his trousers, picked up his cell phone, the room key, put on his sandals, and stealthily left the cabana to search for his friend. He was certain that he was in deep trouble but had no idea what kind. At first he only thought that Palmer had had a great time with Serena and decided to stay at her place, but then remembered exactly what kind of woman she was. No man ever had a great time with her; she had a great time with them and afterwards, tossed them away like so much refuse. No, Palmer was in danger, he was certain of that, and it was time to find him.

“WAKE UP, SERENA! C’MON, I KNOW YOU ARE IN THERE!” Meerschaum yelled into Serena’s bedroom window. Serena lazily lifted the bamboo blind, looked out to see a very angry Meerschaum glaring straight into her golden eyes.
“Dah-ling, what is it? What’s wrong?” she asked in between yawns.
“You know what’s wrong. Where’s Palmer?” Meerschaum demanded.
“How should I know? He left from here hours ago. He had too much to drink, poor thing.” There wasn’t a sincere word in that entire statement and Meerschaum knew it.
“I know you know where he is. Now TELL ME!” Meerschaum’s voice sounded ominous and for the first time, Serena was actually afraid.
“I swear to you, darling. I haven’t the slightest idea where he is! “That was the truth; she had no idea where the two men had dragged Palmer.
“But you know something happened to him, I know you do. So you’d better tell Daddy everything, dah-ling, if you value your life.” For only the second time in his life, Meerschaum pulled out a handgun, complete with a silencer. He knew how to use it but hesitated this time, because he really loved women and found it very difficult to even contemplate shooting one, even one as evil as Serena. When Serena realized that Meerschaum was serious, she became agitated and pale.
“O.K! O.K! I will tell you what happened! BUT PLEASE, DON’T SHOOT ME!” Serena pleaded. So she told him about the two F.L.U.S.H. agents, her drugging of Palmer, and the dragging away of him.
“But I really don’t know where they took him! Please, David, you MUST believe me, I only did it for the money! There is nothing to do here, and I need to eat, after all.” Serena had put on the little-girl-lost look, but it wasn’t lost on Meerschaum. He knew that he couldn’t trust her as much as he couldn’t trust a king cobra.
“So, the F.L.U.S.H. agents have been here for six months? And you are working for them now? Serena, I thought you had better taste than that,” Meerschaum remarked, but still holding the gun on her. His slightly sardonic smile enervated her, and she dropped to her little bedroom chair, shaking. When she did this, she was in full view of Meerschaum.
“Hadn’t you better put something on and help me look for Palmer?” Meerschaum averted his eyes from the lovely scene before him, and Serena suddenly remembered that she never slept in nightgowns, and grabbed the top sheet from the bed, wrapping it around her.
“Of course, Mr. Meerschaum, all things must be done with propriety, mustn’t they?” The sneer in her voice was obvious but Meerschaum ignored it, telling Serena to hurry to get dressed.

They walked out into the early morning, with only a few hours left until the glorious sunrise that only the South Pacific can produce. Meerschaum had a grip on Serena’s arm and was roughly pulling her over the cool sand, when she stumbled on a rock and winced. Meerschaum stopped for a moment, told her he was sorry, and she tried one of her smiles on him, but he wouldn’t be fooled ever again by that smile. Once burnt, twice shy, as the saying goes. So on they trod until they came to the quayside.
“This is where I saw the men drag him and then I went home. I swear to you I don’t know where they took him!” Serena repeated her plea of innocence, while Meerschaum gazed intently onto the pier.
“Wasn’t there a small yacht tied here yesterday?” Meerschaum asked.
“Yes, there was, it belongs to one of the big real estate companies here on the island,”answered Serena. “The name of it is the Island Princess,” she offered.
“The Island Pincess. Hm-m-m-m- . . .”Meerschuam was contemplating this when suddenly heard a loud sound coming from underneath a small fishing boat.
“Help! Help! Somebody, help me! “Meerschaum instantly recognized the voice of Palmer.
“Here, Palmer, it’s Meerschaum! We’ll get you out!” Serena and Meerschaum heaved the boat off of Palmer, who had been tied up at the ankles and wrists with marine rope. In his attempt to loosen it, he had only caused chafed skin, which was not a pretty sight. Meerschaum quickly intied the knots, but Palmer still couldn’t move.
“What took you so long?” asked an anxious Palmer. “I’ve been here all night!! “
“Well, Goody Two-Shoes here double-crossed us,” explained Meerschaum. “It seems she now works for F.L.U.S.H. and was only trying to make a little money.” Serena dutifully blushed at this, but she was able to turn on emotions like a faucet. This time neither men were fooled. Palmer slowly stood up, stretched his aching muscles, and then noticed a briefcase that had been next to him underneath the boat.
”Say, look at this, Meerschaum! Hey, there could be loads of dirty money in here. What do you think—-” But Palmer was cut off, while Meerschaum grabbed him and Serena, ran as far away as possible and then the explosion came: there had been a bomb in the briefcase, one of the tactics frequently used by F.L.U.S.H. to destroy its enemies. All three fell to the ground, but thankfully were unhurt, except for some damaged egos.
“How did you know, Meerschaum?” Palmer asked incredulously.
“Elementary, my dear Palmer. You: A.U.N.T. Them: F.LU.S.H. Briefcase on the beach? Bomb!” Meerschaum brushed the sand from his trouser leg, all the time looking at Serena, and still using his gun for threat purposes.
“Oh, David, you don’t think that I had anything to do with this? I told you, I just got paid for getting Palmer for them, not putting this bomb here! I am telling you the truth!!!”" Serena nearly screamed this, and the two men put their hands on her mouth to quiet her shrill voice.
“Get your dirty hands off my mouth!” She yelled at them, trying to bite their hands.
“O.K. sweetheart, but you are coming with us. You are going to tell us where Mr. John Smith and his buddy are.” With one man on each side of her, painfully grasping her arms, she had no choice but to take them where they wanted to go, but in all the commotion, they hadn’t realized just how loud the bomb was, and soon the entire island was awake and running toward the beach.

“Mister! Mister! What happened? We heard something like a bomb! What happened?” asked the hotel owner. Meerschaum made up a story about the bomb being part of the movie, and was extremely sorry to have awakened and frightened everyone.
“So sorry, everyone, we didn’t mean to disturb the peace. Everything’s all right now, so you can go back to whatever you were doing. Sorry . . .” With that, the three players walked away, to enjoy a much-deserved breakfast, while the island’s tourist population gazed in amazement at how realistic Hollywood movies were these days. . . .

Chapter 5: Just The Facts, Ma’am
During breakfast, Palmer briefed Meerschaum on what he overheard while the two F.L.U.S.H. agents were tying him up.
“They definitely have a grip on this island. Everything’s imported here, you know, food, clothes, etc. There are no industries here, no natural resources except for the usual island fare, coconuts, their by-products, bamboo, that sort of thing. The people here love Kobi beef and would do anything to get it, so when F.L.U.S.H. got wind of the numbers of really wealthy retirees living here, they thought up the Kobe Beef for Money scheme. They go to Japan several times a year, buy up a huge stock of Kobe beef, send it frozen to Bongo-bongo, a voila! Instant success. Dirty green stuff for them, Kobe beef for the islanders.”
“O.K., Palmer, but that doesn’t sound much like terrorism to me,” argued Meerschaum, digging into his quail egg omelet.
“No, Meerschaum, you don’t get it. The terrorism isn’t the Kobe beef, it’s the dirty green stuff that F.L.U.S.H. sends to the terrorist organizations. They make a small profit by holding back some 20% of the earnings, the rest goes to the real terrorists. In other words, the F.L.U.S.H. agents are just flunkies.”
Meerschaum absorbed this interesting bit of information while masticating his chicken by-product. He then took a long swig of the excellent freshly-ground very very strong island-grown coffee.
“So, what we are supposed to do is to stop F.L.U.S.H.’s very lucrative little business between Japan and Bongo-bongo, thereby depleting the enemies of necessary funds for their evil empires, and thereby depleting this lovely tropical island of its main source of income: the rich retirees. How does that sound, Palmer?” Meerschaum gingerly finished his breakfast and pushed the plate away, raised one eyebrow and gave Palmer one of his famous “Got any solutions?” looks.
“Look here, Meerschaum. These guys are criminals. That means that the rich retirees are doing business with criminals. Yeah, I know they don’t know it, but they are going to have to know it, and soon.” Palmer wasn’t about to let Meerschaum’s sentimentality about beautiful tropical islands get in the way of justice. He was right, of course, the big Kobe beef game had to stop, but was there a legal alternative to this addiction? While he sipped his morning espresso, he contemplated what other source of income these good people could employ in order for their livelihoods to survive. They would have to be told about the Kobe beef problem, and an alternative solution would have to present itself to him a.s.a.p.
Meerschaum cleared his throat and looked over at Serena, who had been handcuffed to the table. She hadn’t really been listening at all to this conversation, but instead was staring out at the sea, calm at this time of the morning before the first tide came in. She hadn’t touched her breakfast and seemed depressed.
“As far as the problem of Kobe beef being substituted for another imported product, that is easily solved by asking the people what else they would like that isn’t available here. But the real problem is exterminating F.L.U.S.H. before they exterminate us. We have slightly got away from our mission here, which is to destroy our enemy.” Meerschaum’s sensible words activated Palmer’s quick brain cells, and he realized that their time was running out. Money was still going to the terrorists on a daily basis from this island paradise and it had to stop. John Smith and his colleague were still on the run (perhaps they had already left on that yacht?), so their mission wasn’t over with yet. Serena had proved that she couldn’t be trusted. Too many problems followed the agonizing night Palmer spent under that boat.

“I say we take a small break. I need a shower, change of clothes, connecting to headquarters. See you in an hour, Meerschaum.” Palmer strode off toward their cabana, purpose in his stride and in his heart.
“Ditto,” replied Meerschaum, and, leaving Serena chained to the table, instructed the maitre’d not to let her out of his sight. It was time for him to connect to his laptop and see what was going on in the rest of the world.

Serena Samson was conveniently placed in protective custody by the Bongo-bongo Police Department. Her little cell had all the amenities that a woman of her caliber required: a private toilet, a little sink, a comfortable camp cot, even a little window for her to look out into the world. Unfortunately she wasn’t very happy about this arrangement and protested loudly to the prison guards.

“I said let me out of here! I’m an American citizen! You can’t do this to me! I want a lawyer!” All for naught; the guards simply ignored her until her screaming and yelling started to really get on their nerves.
“Look, Ms. Samson, you had better stop this nonsense or else you will have to be gagged,” one of the guards said.
“You wouldn’t dare touch me,” sneered Serena. “I have diplomatic immunity.”
“Oh, yeah? Since when does a common criminal get diplomatic immunity?” The familiar voice of Palmer startled Serena into silence, but only for a moment.
“Shlomo, oh Shlomo, why did you do this to me? If you let me out, I will help you find the F.L.U.S.H. agents. I know where they went.” Serena decided to change her tune, realizing that cooperating with them would mean gaining her freedom and then she would escape on the next oceanliner that came along.
“Sorry, little one, but this is the safest place for you. After what you did to me last night, do you really think that we trust you anymore?” Palmer unwrapped a Tootsie Roll and popped it into his mouth, and, turning away from the cell, walked out into the warmth of the afternoon. Meerschaum soon met up with him, and they decided they needed an emergency meeting.
“Look, Palmer. This mission isn’t going very smoothly. We are supposed to be squashing F.L.U.S.H. and then getting out of here, and all we’ve accomplished is you getting Micky Finned by that nasty bit of work named Serena, and two of our arch enemies escaping on the yacht. We’ve got to make more progress today, so I bought this stuff to help us.” Meerschaum pointed to a big bag of snorkeling equipment. “We’re going out there in about an hour. There’s a diving boat that will take us out to a reef, where we can snorkel; there’s a small island with some caves that we need to explore. Ever done spelunking?”
“No, not really into that kind of sport,” Palmer answered slowly,” and I’m not sure where we’re going with this. Did you get a tip?”
“Naturally. I don’t usually choose to enter unknown caves in the South Pacific. It’s a known fact that F.L.U.S.H. has an outpost in one of these islands, and according to my sources, it’s that island over there.”
Meerschaum pointed to a distant mountainous little island, which resembled the Rock of Gibraltar. “If my sources are correct, and I have every reason to believe that they are, then our agents will be there. I’ve already got help coming from Fiji and Tonga, so we’ll have cover if needed.” Meerschaum downed the last of his iced tea and beckoned for the waiter. “I’ll have another ice tea; Palmer, what about you? Need another iced chai?” Palmer declined a second drink. If they were going snorkeling and then spelunking, any extra liquids in his system would create a negative balance.

Chapter 6: A Brilliant Deduction

It took just over an hour to reach Tipi. The reef there was beautifully clear and crisp. The shallow water provided a great opportunity for snorkeling and most of the passengers rolled out of the diving boat, to view the sea life. Although neither Palmer nor Meerschaum were very experienced snorkelers or divers, they had some cursory training by Navy Seals just in case of an event such as this. Since they were still in their role of Hollywood agents, they had to maintain that aura of exclusivity that surrounds such people, and had only the best equipment and the finest wet suits available.
Meerschaum waved for Palmer to follow him around the west side of the island, to gain entrance into the grotto. Both men were strong swimmers, and were soon upon the entrance of the cave.
“O.K., Palmer. This is it. Get your magnum ready, we may need it.” Meerschaum checked his weapon and proceeded into the cave. It seemed that someone had been there before them, as a chewing gum wrapper floated past them. Palmer grabbed the little piece of paper and looked at the name: Big Bubble, a well-known American brand. But that didn’t tell him much; this kind of stuff was available all over the world, and didn’t necessarily mean that the gum was being chewed by an American. He decided to keep it anyway as evidence.
The two men hoisted themselves up onto some rocks and rested for a few minutes. It was ominously quiet, the only sound the dripping of water from a small hole in the wall of the cave. The echo it produced made it sound louder than it really was, and Meerschaum was trying to listen intently to any other sound inside the cave, but all was quiet. He put his finger to his lips to signal to Palmer not to make a sound, as they stealthily walked further into the cave, their weapons ready for action.
Suddenly Palmer stopped in his tracks and crouched down, Meerschaum doing the same. He had heard the distinct voice of John Smith, as clear as a bell, coming from somewhere inside the cave. There was someone else with him, probably the other F.L.U.S.H. agent.
“This is it, Meerschaum. This is where we shine. I hear the copters overhead, so let’s go in slowly and wait for our reinforcements before we open fire. Could be nasty.” And with that, the two sleuths inched their way further into the cave. But what they saw through a small crack shocked them to paralysis: Standing only about ten feet from them was the largest counterfeiting operation they had ever seen. Not only was F.L.U.S.H. sending dirty money to terrorists, they were sending funny dirty money, printing it in this unbelievably idyllic place. It seemed a sin, a real sin, to ruin the lovliness of this natural beauty, with the workings of evil, Meerschaum thought. Now they would have to change their strategy, and change it quickly. Reinforcements were on their way, but would they arrive in time?

Chapter 7: In the Eye of the Storm

“Good afternoon, Mr. Meerschaum and Mr. Palmer, Hollywood agents—-or is that A.U.N.T. agents?” The very distinctive voice of John Smith shattered the silence of the cave. Meerschaum and Palmer turned around quickly to notice Mr. Smith, and his colleague, who’s name they still didn’t know. Frozen with terror, neither sleuth said a word as the two antagonistas closed in on them, both carrying Kalishnakov’s. “Gentlemen, drop your weapons! You are up against greater power.” Our two heros had no choice but to do as they were bid, the guns clanging to the ground, echoing throughout the cave. The hitherto unnamed Mr. Jones, Mr. Smith’s colleague, slithered over to snatch the weapons, keeping his gun aimed on Meerschaum and Palmer.
“Isn’t it just too bad that you found out where we’ve been hiding?” Mr. Smith said as he stood there, glaring at the two captives, a twinkle in his beady eyes. “I can’t decide if you are more valuable to us dead or alive. If we kill you, we will not find out any more secrets about your organization, but if we allow you to live, you will be our prisoners and there’s always the possibility that you will escape and ruin our little business here,” went on Smith, sweeping his hands over the counterfeit works.
“”Keep talking, Smith, and by the time you’re finished with your little soliloquy our reinforcements will be on top of you; maybe you’ll be atomized right in front of our eyes.” Palmer felt the disadvantage of their positions but wasn’t about to let their enemies know this.
Trying desperately to think of their next move, the one that would save their lives, Meerschaum and Palmer heard the sound of helicopters overhead. The two thugs heard them too, and in their panic, lost concentration for a moment. In that second, the two A.U.N.T. agents, who were still in their wet suits, dropped into the nearby water. Smith and Jones opened up fire on them but it was too late, our two sleuths had escaped out into the sea, and waved down the helicopters. Their help had arrived in the eleventh hour; a ladder fell down from the copter and the two men climbed up to safety. They explained the situation to the two agents who rescued them and they flew to the other side of the island.
Smith and Jones were now trapped inside the cave and the only way to escape was their little yacht, but that was taking a huge chance. They ran through to the other side of the cave and heard a huge explosion. Their yacht had just been decimated and now they were truly trapped. Thinking to destroy their own counterfeiting machines, they laid dynamite at strategic points and were about to ignite it when a team of twelve divers, more A.U.N.T. agents, surrounded them. Now they knew it was over.

“Don’t bother to blow it up or swallow that cyanide pill. We want you guys alive. Drop your weapons.”
The two criminals dutifully did as commanded. Four agents whipped handcuffs on them and they were shoved into a small boat.

Meerschaum and Palmer had been dropped down again onto the island to find out who their captors really were.
“I would like to introduce you to Alexei Stronakov and Boris Ching, two of the most wanted terror-supporting slimes in the world.” The spokesman for the arriving agents beamed as he announced this amazing bit of information.
“Russians. That figures,” said Palmer, as he spit in the water, making a little wave. Meerschaum looked just as repulsed as Palmer, and just stared at the two men who nearly took their lives. He was exhausted and just wanted to go home. All the exhilaration had gone out of this mission and he felt flat and depressed. He was thinking of Serena, still back at Bongo-bongo, still in prison, still the same wicked woman she always was. A familiar voice shook him out of his reverie.
“Hey, Meerschaum, are you still with us?” Palmer put his hand on Meerschaum’s shoulder. His buddy just nodded his head, too tired to speak.
The counterfeiting operation was exposed, the criminals justly arrested, and Meerschaum and Palmer boarded another dive boat back for Bongo-bongo. It was early evening by the time they arrived and most of the island was still in the enchanting time of siesta. They made their way back to their cabana and sat for a few minutes, absorbing the day’s exciting action. Meerschaum suggested that Palmer shower first, that he had something to do. He opened his laptop, unlocked it and read his emails. He immediately saw one from an old girlfriend from university days, and wondered how she got his email? Was it a trick? He had learned in this business to be suspicious first, trusting last. He read through the message and couldn’t see anything more in it except a friendly “hello, how are you?” type of message, so decided to reply. The Serena days were over; Palmer could have her, if he wanted her. It was time for him to move on to better things.

Chapter 8: All in a Day’s Work

The next morning broke sunny and promising. Meershaum and Palmer were having breakfast in the seaside restaurant, the Mermaid, when Serena walked up to their table.
“May I join you gentlemen?” She asked in that unnerving way.
“Of course, please sit down.” Both men stood up, and pulled a chair out for the siren. She sat demurely, fluffing her beautiful hair and straightening her skirt. “Could I please have an orange juice?” she asked the waiter.
“Orange juice? Since when do you drink orange juice? What happened to your usual breakfast cognac?” Meerschaum asked.
“I’ve reformed, David. It was that prison time that did it. I realized that my life was such a mess, and I just want to go straight.” As she said this, she took a small book from her handbag, entitled: ‘You Can Do It’.
Meerschaum stared at her. Could this be the end of a beautiful foeship? Is this for real?
“Look, Serena, if you think you can pull the wool over our eyes, you are sorely mistaken.” Meerschaum continued eating his papaya, avoiding Serena’s gaze.
“It’s true, David. I really have changed. Palmer and I are going to get married.”
Meerschaum choked on his fruit. “MARRIED? YOU? PALMER? I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!”
“Hold on, buddy, ” Palmer said, laughing. “You don’t want her anymore, and we discovered we have a lot in common. We really get a long great, don’t we sweetheart?” Palmer gave Serena a little kiss and she blushed.
Meerschaum could hardly believe this mushy stuff going on in front of his eyes. “You mean to tell me that even after she tried to sell you to F.L.U.S.H. you two are a team?” Palmer merely nodded, too absorbed in his new love. “Well, I suppose I should say congratulations. I think I’ll leave you two alone while I go pack.” Meerschaum left the couple and walked back to their cabana. His mind was spinning at this shocking piece of news. Had Palmer lost his mind? Oh well, never underestimate the power of women.

As the two men and Serena were about to board their launch to take them to the arriving oceanliner, the King of the Sea, the mayor of Bongo-bongo ran up to them.
“Please, Mr. Meerschaum, Mr. Palmer. I just want to thank you for ending this reign of terror by F.L.U.S.H. When we found out what these supposed traders were up to, we were very very shocked. Thank you for “flushing” them out. Ha-ha-ha!!! And thank you for our new trade—coffee. Now we can market our own product and sell it all over the world. No more Kobe beef for us! It’s coffee forever! Starbuck’s, move over, Bongo-bongo coffee shops will be even bigger than you!” With that last triumphant blast, the mayor strutted away towards the hotel for a celebration drink of his brew.

On the plane back to the States, Palmer and Serena were fast in conversation, while Meerschaum was thinking about all that transpired. Another mission accomplished, but that feeling of elation would soon wear off, as it always did. He looked over at Palmer and his new love, with a little envy, but he had his own new life to start. He opened his emails again and re-read the one from his former girlfriend. A slow smile grew on his face, as he remembered her lovely blond hair, those freckles, hazel eyes . . . yes, he was looking forward to going home.

Fin

Tags: Evil, Holiday, Takes

Outraged Kerry Takes the Gloves Off at Last After Republican Jibes

John Kerry launched a stinging and personal counter-attack against George Bush’s administration, singling out Dick Cheney, the vice-president, for having “refused to serve” in Vietnam.

The ferocity of the Democratic party’s presidential challenger at the midnight rally of supporters in Ohio marked a sharp change in his campaign tactics. A few hours earlier, at the Republican party convention in New York, President Bush had joined in Mr Cheney’s derision of Senator Kerry as a vacillating liberal.

The president repeated those charges yesterday at a rally in Pennsylvania, lampooning Mr Kerry for voting to go to war in Iraq and then opposing a funding request in the Senate for the occupation.

“He said he was proud of his vote, and then he just said the whole thing was a complicated matter. His words,” Mr Bush said. “Here are my words: There’s nothing complicated about supporting our troops in combat.”

The charge that Mr Kerry was “unfit for command” was a main theme of the Republican convention, provoking outrage from the senator. He said: “I’m not going to have my commitment to defend this country questioned by those who refused to serve when they could have, and by those who misled the nation into Iraq.”

Mr Kerry’s seemed to be using his speech to release months of pent-up anger.

In the face of a campaign by rightwing Vietnam war veterans to question whether he merited his five combat medals, the senator had until yesterday refrained from referring directly to the actions of Mr Bush or Mr Cheney during the Vietnam era.

Both men avoided combat, while the young Lieutenant Kerry was fighting in the Mekong Delta. Mr Bush signed up with the Texas air national guard as a pilot; Mr Cheney was granted five deferments from the draft for attending college, then graduate school and finally for having a child.

The new gloves-off strategy begins after a week of debate and unease within the Kerry camp over the wisdom of restraint. It coincided with the hiring of Joe Lockhart, a former spokesman for Bill Clinton with a combative reputation.

In yesterday’s speech Mr Kerry made it clear he was aiming his accusations principally at the vice-president, who had used his Wednesday night speech to portray the Democratic candidate as unfit to be commander in chief.

Mr Kerry responded: “I’ll leave it up to the voters to decide whether five deferments makes someone more qualified to defend this nation than two tours of duty.

“Let me tell you what I think makes someone unfit for duty: misleading our nation into war in Iraq makes you unfit to lead this nation. Doing nothing while this nation loses millions of jobs makes you unfit to lead this nation … That’s the record of George Bush and Dick Cheney”

He also implied that the vice-president was guilty of a financial conflict of interests, accusing him of handing out contracts to his former employer, the oil services company Halliburton, “while you’re still on their payroll”.

Mr Cheney continues to receive annual payments of “deferred compensation” from Halliburton for his past work as its chief executive, but the White House has denied that he had any role in awarding the company contracts in Iraq.

Mr Kerry’s tough approach satisfied his cheering supporters but it carries inherent risks for a candidate claiming to be more capable than the president of unifying the US.

Some pundits also wondered whether Mr Kerry had left his counter-attack too late.

“We’re at the point now where all’s fair in love and war, and politics is war,” said Larry Sabato, a political science professor at the University of Virginia. “The problem is Kerry is out of synch. The time for this was a month ago, but it came on a night when all the coverage went to Bush’s speech. I find it incredibly odd.”

Both sides argued over the significance of new employment figures published yesterday showing a net creation of 144,000 jobs in August.

The total was a little below most projections but still up on July. Speaking at a rally in Pennsylvania, Mr Bush said the figures showed that the economy was growing, and he added the catchphrase he used when accepting the Republican presidential nomination on Thursday: “Nothing will hold us back.”

Tags: After, Gloves, Jibes, Kerry, Last, Outraged, Republican, Takes

HSBC takes slice of American pie

HSBC signalled a major expansion in the US today, paying $14bn (£8.8bn) for Household International, a leading lender to people with poor credit.

HSBC, Europe’s biggest bank, said the move would give it a national network for consumer lending in the key US market, as well as improving the geographic spread of its earnings and increasing its consumer assets.

The deal is a bold step for HSBC, which has built up a reputation for steady and conservative management in what is a tough climate for the financial services industry. In the past the US has proved to be a graveyard for the ambitions of European commercial and investment banks.

HSBC shares fell almost 4% to 679.5p amid concern over a move into the US at a time when the world’s largest economy is faltering, with consumer debt levels high. HSBC will issue more shares as part of the acquisition, contributing to pressure on HSBC stock.

Based in Illinois, Household started out as a jewellery store in 1878 and now has 50 million customers. It operates 1,400 branches in the US and 300 in Canada and Britain. The second consumer finance firm in America after Citigroup, Household is a leading player in the so-called subprime market, catering to people who have problems borrowing from established high street banks – typically the less well-off.

Subprime lending is one of the fastest growing areas of the financial services industry, but the practice has come under increasing scrutiny from regulators. Household has been named in several lawsuits and last month agreed to pay $484m to settle claims that it engaged in “predatory” lending by charging poorer borrowers excessive interest rates on loans.

At the time, the Iowa attorney general, Tom Miller, said the settlement was the biggest ever in a predatory lending case. HSBC said it considered the settlement “conclusive”.

“It was a far-reaching settlement,” said HSBC chairman Sir John Bond, who defended the move into the subprime market. He pointed out that the US subprime market grew 13.4% in recent years, compared to 2% growth in the national mortgage market.

“These are people who need banks,” he said. “We know of people aged 40-50 in every country, but we’ve never had the technology or skill set to do what Household does.”

The credit rating agency Moody’s confirmed its high A1 rating for HSBC bonds, but cautioned that the acquisition represented a “material diversification” away from HSBC’s traditional retail and commercial banking businesses.

“The group clearly has the financial resources to manage this new line of business, but integrating Household in the overall business culture of the group remains an inherent challenge,” Moody’s said.

Analysts also pointed to the risky timing of the move.

“Given the state of the US economy and how indebted US consumers are, there are risks,” Euan Stirling, a fund manager at Standard Life Investments, told Reuters.

But Sir John downplayed these risks, remaining upbeat about prospects for the US economy. “There will still be people paying back their mortgages and using their credit cards [in spite] of what is going on in the geopolitical scene. We believe that the American consumer will continue to consume,” he said.

The deal is expected to have implications for the UK credit card market, where Household has an estimated 2.5 million cardholders. In recent years HSBC has been struggling to maintain its position in the UK credit card market; at the end of 2001 it ceded fourth place to HBOS.

“The addition of Household’s credit cardholders will certainly bolster its [HSBC's] flagging performance,” said Helen Smith, an analyst with Datamonitor, the business information company. “On a more general note, the deal points to the continuing trend of consolidation in the UK credit card market.”

Tags: American, HSBC, slice, Takes

Ever Wonder What it Takes to Broadcast Radio From Your Own Home?

Ever since the beginning people began forming organizations, being lured by amatuer radio technology. The big difference between ham radio and CB radio is that amateur radio setups can be up to 1000 watts and have unrestricted antennas. The available wavebends are more diverse and less crowded and you can even obtain access to very specialized teletype and tv frequencies. With the addition of satellite advancements no corner of the world is beyond your reach. The issue is that amateur radio is licensed and there are tests you must to pass before you can get the license.

Depending on what you want to accomplish there are several licenses available.

The Novice level license conveys access to some HF bands and SSB transceiving between 28.3 and 28.5 MHz and also between 28.1 and 28.3 for radio tele-type. To access these [frequencieschannels] all you need is a 10 Meter Radio [Althougheven though] these radios are [oftencommonly] referred to as a 10 Meter CB Radio they are [actually quite differentquite differnt] as a CB radio does not require [ayou to have a] license and a 10 Meter Radio does. SSB and FM transmissions are allowed between 222.01 and 223.91 Mhz and 1270 – 1295 Mhz too.All it takes to get a Novice license is a simple radio theory exam and the capability to operate Morse code at 5 words per minute.

The Technician license restricts voice broadcasting to the same frequency range as the Novice in addition to the VHF and UHF ham radio bands[AcquiringObtainingGettingAchieveing] a Technicians license [opens upgives access togrants access to] the VHF and UHF bands.~The Technicians license means that you can now [transmitbroadcast] on the UHF and VHF [frequencieschannels]. In order to obtain this license all you must do is pass a simple test about radio theory and FCC regulations.

Next after the Technicians Class is the General Class. The General Class aloows broadcasting on HF and UHF across the entire spectrum and even a few television frequencies. To get this license you must have the ability to work Morse code at the speed of 13 wpm and pass an exam on general radio theory plus FCC requirements.

The Advanced radio license grants access to more frequencies in the HF band, but in order to get this you need to have completed the General class Morse Code and radio theory exams and a more complicated radio theory test.

In the US the best amatuer radio license you can obtain is the Extra Class.. People who have this license have complete access to all HF VHF and UHF frequencies which are designated to ham radio. To get this license you need to have passed the previos licencing tests and pass a new, more advanced theory and morse code test..

The American Radio Relay League is a non profit group that helps ham radio operators complete their exams by providing all the materials you may need.

Like many people you may not really enjoy to undergo all that testing, try CB radio. There are no examinations to pass and there is no license to obtain. The verbage used is relaxed and there’s no need to learn Morse Code. Just go purchase a radio and an antenna and are ready to go. Sound fun?

Tags: Broadcast, Ever, From, Home, Radio, Takes, Wonder

Reliv Scam? Learn What It Really Takes To Succeed With Reliv

So, is there a Reliv scam? Reliv international has been presented to you recently. So, you’re out on the World Wide Web doing some research and that’s a good thing. If you’re going to get involved with an MLM company it’s best to make sure it’s a good fit for you. Well, you probably already know that the Reliv company sells nutritional products. We will look at these products a little bit closer and also delve into some even more important details in this Reliv review.

Robert L. Montgomery started Reliv in 1985. The company is based in Chesterfield, Missouri. The company actually began their distributor network in 1988. Reliv has the rights to five nutritional patents and claims have more on the way. They are now in operation in over 14 countries with plans to expand further in Europe and Asia. RELV is the company’s publicly traded stock ticker.

This company set out to create health and wellness supplements and functional foods that would relieve many different ailments. Their range of products have ingredients and claim to give benefits from plants such as soy and herbs and they also tout their high antioxidant levels. The products specifically target issues like women’s health, performance and energy, healthy joints, and the aging, kids health, heart health and blood sugar management just to name a few. Reliv’s two best selling products provide a balanced mix of herbs vitamins protein and minerals and are called Reliv classic in Reliv now.

Let’s look a bit at how distributors are paid to run their Reliv business. The company offers profit-sharing at the highest levels of the plan which are referred to as ambassador levels, there are five. Just to reach the lowest master level 4000 per month is required. There are also other income streams that can be created as a Reliv distributor. These four, could be in addition to or separate from the ambassador commissions. The first and simplest is the retail income which represents about 20% to 40% of sales. A wholesale income which is earned from the distributors direct team is another income stream. These are distributors that go on to generate sales of which will benefit the senior distributor. When a team member breaks away to build their own team override incomes can be generated. The fourth stream of income comes from cash bonuses and trips.

Reliv has many customers and distributors who swear by their products. However as we take a look at the support and training offered by Reliv we discover that it’s the same old same old traditional networking training. While there’ve been many people to succeed this way, these many people only make up 3% of the industry. I don’t know about you, but I don’t like those odds. So why do the other 97% fail? Mostly because the methods that are taught are ancient. Why would we contact family and friends when they want nothing to do with our business? That is like a TV salesman trying to get an Amish man to buy his latest 42 inch flatscreen television. Sounds funny, but that’s what’s going on when we go about MLM this way.

The problem is most people do not search for a better way. That’s exactly what I did, I searched and searched some more until I found something that made sense. What’s funny is it’s right there under your nose the whole time. It’s that word, marketing. Utilize that word, and avoid rejection forever.

Tags: Learn, Really, Reliv, Scam, Succeed, Takes

What it Takes to Become a Blogging Expert

Sometimes its better for your marketing career to just relax, do some planning and break things down into its micro components rather than looking at the big picture. The reason I say this is because it is the small steps you take executed over some time that will build the momentum necessary for you to become successful.

If there are 200 steps you have to climb to reach the top of the stadium, you might twist your ankle or even break your leg if you try to skip 6 steps on the way up. So why do it? I’m 40 years old as of the time of this writing, and if I didn’t rush things or try to make things happen too fast I’d be a millionaire right now without having to do much at all.

The good thing is that it is never too late to make up for lost time. And even better, you can put in as many hours as you want right from your own home. So the question is what is the appropriate Home Business Model to engage in that will allow anyone to build their business at their own pace and for little or zero cost? The answer is Blogging. Anyone can become a Blogging Expert within 6 months with just a few pointers.

It doesn’t take a technical wizard to Become a Blogger. However you should know how to type, preferably 45 words per minute or more. Then the process becomes a lot more fun. Community Colleges have typing courses that are usually self-paced lab type courses so if your typing is too slow or you find yourself having to look for keys, practice as much as necessary to get through this hurdle.

Before you start Blogging, you also want to find a subject you will be comfortable Blogging about. Yes you can have your articles Ghost Written but in the last 3 months I’ve found it’s much more fun and a lot less costly to write them myself.

For example if you know how to play guitar, there is a massive and very commercially viable Niche Market out there for guitar playing and it is for the most part untapped. Millions of people want to learn to play the guitar, but a vast majority stink at it. Personally this is not what I’m into but if I was I’d be hitting this market with everything I had. For example Clickbank offers an affiliate program called Jamorama that pays 75% commissions.

There are many other examples so for now I’m just trying to get your creative juices flowing. Lets say worse case scenario you aren’t an expert at anything commercially viable yet. And by the way to test the commercial viability of a market is simple. Just visit google and type in what your want to blog about. If 4 or more Google AdWords ads come up you will be able to earn yourself some monthly residual income blogging in this niche.

The next thing you want to do is to get yourself a domain name. GoDaddy, 1and1 and Namecheap are all good choices. Then get Low Cost Website hosting that costs under $10.00 per month. HostGator and HostMonster are both excellent choices. And a good theme like the Ultimate Blogging Theme from Carl Ocab will only set you back $67.00. And a nice header graphic to represent your blog might cost you another $25.00. So for under $100.00 you can get a very nice blog up and running.

See you don’t have to sell the farm to become a Blogging Expert. The next thing you want to do is to start writing 1-2 articles per day for the first six months. First post them on your blog. Then take the same article and submit them to all the article directories except for the article directories that specifically require unique content. Write similar unique articles for these directories. This will give each page on your Blog backlinks.

Google runs on unique content and they just love it. The name of the game is the person who has the most unique content out there at the end of the day wins the game. But this is a marathon lifestyle not a sprint. By this I mean that you want to put in your work then walk away from the computer. You don’t want to work 16 hours one day then get frustrated and quit. Get on a consistent Blogging Schedule where you spend 3-4 hours per day or even 1-2 is fine if you work full time. And always take one day per week off.

My partner and myself run a large Network Marketing Blog. By following the advice I’m giving you in this article we’ve been able to increase our traffic about 300 unique visitors per day within 90 days. The reason is we’re getting quite a few Retweets and the Free Article Directories we submit to get us lots of pings via RSS feeds. People subscribe to RSS Feeds through these directories with certain keywords or categories.

So when we write on a particular category their blogs automatically pick up our content and we get pinged. Sometimes I’m really motivated and get 5 articles out within one day. It’s not uncommon for us to get 30-40 pings in one day when we do this. I hope this article gives you a few more pieces to the puzzle you are missing.

One more Blogging Tip I think you can benefit from before I close this out is that if you visit the plugin portion of your Word Press Blog, you will notice that it contains a search feature. You can use this function to search for many different Plug-Ins that will make your blog do the coolest things. For example there are Plug-Ins that will automatically post to your Twitter and Facebook page. Also check out the Top Commentators Widget. This encourages people to post on your blog.

In summary it will take you 6-9 months of practice to get things mastered. And if you hang in there and keep blogging you’ll start to really reap the rewards. We wish you the best of luck in your Blogging Efforts.

Learn about Yoli Blast Caps from Brian Garvin and Jeff West.

Tags: Become, Blogging, Expert, Takes

Attracting Top Talent: Do You Have What it Takes?

Today’s employees are attracted by a hiring package with both extrinsic (pay and benefits) and intrinsic (motivation, training opportunities, etc.) elements. But does your organization have the right mix?

There’s really only one way to find out: Ask them. Hold focus groups or distribute questionnaires to your employees with the purpose of determining what they think of your present pay and benefits program and also the work environment. Which benefits do they rate the highest? Which are least important to them? What do they find most and least desirable about their jobs and the workplace?

Studies have been done by numerous compensation organizations and they have identified the following as the most important benefits:

* RRSP or other matched employee retirement plans
* Dental plan
* Pension plan
* Pay for performance compensation
* Flexible working hours
* Childcare
* Tuition reimbursement

Ideally, say the experts, you should be offering each of these. But if you can’t offer them all, determine which you should be offering based upon your employee focus groups and survey findings.

Likewise, examine employees’ opinions about their jobs and the workplace. The ideal company offers:

- Job security
- Employee participation in decision-making
- Work/family balance
- Increased employability through training and development opportunities

Of the elements above, which are missing in your organization? If they aren’t there, they should be. Whereas the elements in your benefits package most important to your workforce will vary with the nature of the group (e.g., younger employees will be interested in childcare or tuition reimbursement, or funds to finance a new home), all, regardless of their place in their careers, want job security, involvement in decision-making, training opportunities, and time to enjoy their families along with their jobs.

Once you have retooled your package to attract those employees your firm needs, your next step is to determine how to market your revised package. If you have a website, and you are looking for technical people, make sure that you advertise on it. Visit the websites of competitive firms to determine how they use their site to prospect for job candidates. Job search sites should be part of your marketing plans, of course. But you shouldn’t limit yourself to them. Don’t forget newspaper classifieds.

Classifieds aren’t as effective as they once were, especially if you are recruiting from among those who are still employed. But you can increase their usefulness if you highlight in the ad what candidates would find most attractive about the job (e.g., good pay, great benefits, childcare, employability). Actually, you should do this in all ads you run.

Here’s another avenue for marketing your job openings: direct mail.

Send out mailings to those individuals who match the profile of recruits you want. Associations or magazines targeted to your industry or the necessary discipline can provide the mailing list and names of candidates with the general background you want.

This provides a new avenue for the top talent you want.

Tags: Attracting, Takes, Talent